“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.” —Timber Hawkeye

Having a child with a chronic condition will naturally lead to being overwhelmed. Overwhelmed with caring for your child. Overwhelmed with the need to advocate or ask for help. Overwhelmed with creating balance in your life. Experiencing this emotion is normal, but we become stuck when we continue carrying this emotion.

Feeling negative emotions like overwhelm or worry is part of living, but continuing to live with the emotion is a choice. When my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes, I stared at all her supplies and immediately felt overwhelmed. As life continued, I continued feeling this emotion and despite having a long to-do list, I would find myself binging on television. I was not motivated, but what I didn’t realize at the time, motivation is something we create, not something that is bestowed upon us.

Understanding the connection between our mind and our actions, I now know my lack of motivation was because I was overwhelmed. I was trying to escape my feeling of being overwhelmed and would instead seek pleasure doing brainless activities and waiting for motivation to appear. As this behavior continued, my to-do list grew longer and I became even more overwhelmed. I was in a never-ending cycle.

We can choose how we think and as a result, we are choosing how we feel. I didn’t want to feel overwhelmed so I began practicing techniques to change how I was thinking. I learned that our brain is trying to protect and when we are trying to change, our mind is trying to resist because the status quo is safe. It was time to take control of my new life and build confidence in myself that I could stay balanced in my roles as a mother and career woman.

Changing thoughts that are leading to indulgent emotions take practice. It is similar to a person faced with entering a pool. They don’t want to do it initially because they are afraid it is cold. As the person dips their toes in, they provide evidence to their brain that the water is comfortable. Slowly, but surely, the person is able to enter the water. Our thoughts about a motivated life take time to change, but continuing to provide evidence to your thoughts allows the overwhelm to slowly resolve.

 Are you unmotivated because you are really overwhelmed?

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-Maureen